I received an advanced reader copy of Sarah Mae’s new book “The Complicated Heart”. Once I started it, I finished it the next day. It was so captivating that I could not put it down. It is currently available for preorder. You can get the audiobook version for FREE if you preorder before 9/17. Just visit thecomplicatedheart.com for more info and to claim your preorder bonus!
Goodness, where do I even start? There is so much to unpack, and I’m sure I will not do this justice.
Sarah’s mother was an alcoholic. She was abusive and mean, but Sarah desperately wanted to be loved. Sarah was sexually abused by men..boys.. who would take advantage of her. Here’s the thing that you should know about Sarah. She doesn’t shy away from the messy and ugly parts of her testimony… the ones that so many want to hide in the closet. She shares it all. She shares the hard things so that she can point directly to God. As if she is saying, “Look at God! Look what God did in me through this.”
I don’t want to give too much of the book away. The story is so captivating and heartbreaking. The story of redemption in her and her mother is BEAUTIFUL.
There are definitely parts of the book that are hard to swallow. She writes in the beginning about ways to examine if you are in a place to read what she has written. Here’s your warning that I’m going to talk about some of them..
When Sarah was 16, she got pregnant. She wanted to keep the baby, but her grandmother would no longer speak to her. She was desperate for love and agreed to have an abortion (link to her story). This part of Sarah’s story changed my life. I was able to see abortion through the eyes of a scared teenager desperate for people to love her again instead of from the Christian circle eyes of condemnation. Here’s the thing. In Christian circles, we label abortion as murder; which it is. BUT, we fail to stop and reach out to love on the scared teen mom expecting a baby. We don’t LOVINGLY encourage her to find and follow Jesus. We shame and condemn as though HER sin (and HIS.. let’s stop ignoring that) is so much worse than our sin. Our sin of gossiping, lying, having a bad attitude, gluttony, etc. Jesus died to cover ALL sins.. not just our “minor” sins.. Sin is sin is sin by the way. Sarah sharing this has allowed me to minister to multiple women who carry the weight and shame of their decisions in a way that I probably never would have been able to otherwise.
As the book goes on, we learn more about Sarah’s mother, Susan. We see that she, too, was deeply wounded and never knew how to show love. She, too, was abused by one of her parents. We see the story of her coming to know Jesus. We see the story of restored relationships. We see the hurt and heartbreak. The joy and celebration. The struggle. We see the legacy of abuse and shame ending.
I am blessed. I grew up with two loving parents who showed me love. I was never abused. I never walked through the pain that Sarah or her mother did. But, I know that is not the story for everyone. This book is incredible. This book will change lives. I am so thankful that Sarah told their story.
I HIGHLY encourage you to pre-order this book. If you can’t afford that, get on the hold list ASAP at your local library. In the mean time, you can follow Sarah on her blog, Instagram, or Facebook and see how incredibly God has used her.