Yesterday, I had been on the Auto-immune protocol diet for a little over 3 weeks. I was close to getting to reintroduce foods to my diet and find my triggers. My thyroid size had shrunk down significantly; so much that people had noticed. It was hard. You are making everything fresh and from plant-based ingredients and animal proteins. It requires a LOT of work and preparation. In my case, it required a lot of tears and frustration also.
Yesterday, we had a smooth Sunday. I know, daylight savings time and smooth don’t go together!! Well, I prepared. Neither of the girls had napped on Saturday, so we got them ready for bed and put them down early. They fell asleep early, and woke up at just the right time to get ready for church. Other than Harper, who slept in late even if the time hadn’t changed. No big deal. I just got her ready and took her to the church and fed her there. I was feeling relaxed and not at all my usual annoyed state. Let’s face it, Sundays are hard when you have a family to get ready. Throw in the fact that you are in ministry and everyone is watching you, and Sunday’s can be downright miserable some days. I’m just being real here. I wouldn’t trade ministry for the world, but it is tough.
Anyway, I noticed during Sunday school that I felt like my heart was beating faster than usual. No big deal. I had just climbed a tall flight of stairs to get to the Loft. I went down for choir practice and was feeling completely out of breath. I had to run back up to the loft to get something for Pastor, and when I came back and I really was not feeling right. I am in the praise team, so while standing there singing I kept feeling like I was going to faint. There are really hot lights shining on the stage, and we were singing. I rapidly kept feeling worse. As soon as I was off stage I grabbed Scott and pulled him outside. I asked him to feel my heart, which now could be SEEN beating rapidly. He made me sit down and waited a little while to take my pulse. It was 122. He told me to go to his office and just relax. I started feeling a little better. Once church was over, I went to meet up with Scott. I got caught talking to people and as I was standing there I started feeling really terrible. We went home and Scott got the girls lunch while I laid on the couch.
I remembered that symptoms of a heart attack are different in women. I looked them up because I couldn’t remember all of them. I started to worry because I had most of the symptoms. I asked Scott if he could take me to the ER just to be safe. My heart rate is always kind of low, and there was no reason for me to be so short of breath just laying around on the couch. We got a sitter and went. At the ER they put a monitor on my finger and saw that my heart rate was 110. They got me back really quickly and did an EKG and put in IV in. They did blood work and started running tests. they put me in my own room with a private bathroom, which was super except they hooked me up to a heart monitor and I was stuck in the bed for the nearly 5 hours that I was there. I told the doctor about having chronic thyroid disease, epilepsy, and having a small PFO, even though I figured that it really didn’t matter. She looked into the diet and went to check my thyroid levels.
Long story long.. my body was basically in starvation mode. She said that she applauded me for the dedication that it took to do a diet like that, but that it was not in my best interest right now because I am still breast feeding Harper. So, tomorrow I follow up with my doctor and find out what I am supposed to do now.
My thyroid works just fine according to blood work, but like the doctor said, my levels can just be fine and my thyroid is working in overdrive to keep it that way; hence the swelling. I am not sure what to do next. If I just let it go until I am done nursing, then that is at least 4 months of constant inflammation; increasing the risk of cancer developing. If I start taking medicine, then it’s over. I can’t go back. If I just have them remove it, then there are no options available.
I am so frustrated right now. I try so hard to take care of this body, and it feels like it just keeps blowing up in my face. A friend told me over the weekend, “Don’t quit. You know you have an enemy who wants to take your life. Don’t quit.” Satan is trying to destroy me. He is fighting so hard, and some days I feel like he is winning. I won’t let him. Please pray that I can have wisdom to know what the best choice will be, and that I can have peace with whatever that is…
Also, tomorrow is a huge day for my family and the situation that I asked that you pray about before… please continue praying.
