Before we were anywhere near a new year, I had determined that I was NOT going to set goals. I was NOT going to pray about a word for the year. I was not going to do anything. I am incredibly stubborn, if you didn’t know that about me. The past few years have put Scott and I through the deepest valleys, and I was tired of trying.
Then, December hit. I kept feeling a tug at my heart about setting myself up for success in 2018. I’m turning 30 this year. Scott and I celebrate our 10 year wedding anniversary. This year is big.
I was still feeling stubborn. Then a word came to my heart. It kept hitting me in the face everywhere that I turned. So, I decided to swallow my pride. I could not let this go, and the more that I thought of it, the more I knew that it had to be my focus.
INTENTIONAL.
I want need to be more intentional.
I need to be intentional with my husband. Setting up intentional dates, even if it is just a walk in the park (when it’s MUCH warmer) or going to get groceries together. I need to be intentional about putting the to do list down when the kids are in bed and spend time with him. I need to be so much more intentional in my marriage.
I need to be more intentional with my children. They need a fully present and focused mom. Too often, I don’t look up from what I am doing when they are speaking to me. Then, I get frustrated that they don’t LOOK AT ME when I am speaking to them. I tell them “I’m busy right now, give me a minute.” A minute quickly turns into an hour and then the time is gone.
I need to be more intentional with my time. I waste so much time. SO. MUCH. TIME. Ugh. Scrolling Instagram. Watching stupid videos on Facebook. Searching pinterest for homeschool rooms that will never be attainable for 99% of homeschooling moms. Refreshing my e-mail, as though I’m going to get a legitimate “you’ve won one million dollars” e-mail. What on earth? I have STACKS of books I want to read. I have piles of games that I could be playing with my daughters. I have book to read to them over and over again. We have crafts to do. I need to get back into regular quiet time with the Lord. Our uprooted and shaken lives have caused me to throw that as last priority; probably some of my bitterness has also allowed that to happen, if I am honest. Ouch. It so hurts to admit that.
I also have had a phrase going through my head. When I think of a dream or ANYTHING I want to achieve, I always talk myself out of it. I find every excuse as to why I can’t make that happen. Nothing ever works out for me. I’m not good enough. I’ll never be enough.
I have recently started saying WHY NOT? Why can’t I achieve my dreams? Why can’t I set goals and reach them? Why on earth not? No one can get in the way of me except me.
I need to stop limiting myself.
Please do yourself a favor. Please dream big dreams and set big goals. Please know that YOU CAN DO IT if you work hard– if you are intentional.
I would really love to hear from you. What are you hoping to achieve in this new year? Also, what would you like to see more of here in this space? Would you like to see more of our homeschooling? More of my amazon obsessions? More real talk? I’m all ears!
I hope that you had a wonderful New Years Day with your loved ones. Please continue holding those who are hurting close to your heart and keeping them in your prayers. Better yet, give them a call or send them a text [especially if they have young kids] and check on them. Tell them that you are thinking of them.
Thank you so much for your support and love.